A Sacred Portal

Within a woman’s body is a sacred portal through which life itself is created. As such, intimacy with a woman allows for connection to the God-Source within that woman. And, for a woman, for connection to the God-Source within her own body. The sacral space fuels the energy of creativity, not just of life – of the conception and birthing of children, but of the creation of art, music, poetry, and all other gifts of beauty to the world. When a woman gives her body against her will, or to meet the wants or desires of others, or if her body is used or abused rather than revered, without healing, it will contract and close up, therefore inhibiting the flow of creative energy, restricting her creative output and ability for intimacy with others, and severing her connection to her lifeforce energy / the God-Source within.

We live in a world where we are surrounded by people who are in relationships and who are having sex, and for a wide range of reasons. Some of these may be conscious and healthy, however many in the world are making choices from a semi-conscious state, not knowing that they are replaying old patterns or balancing karma. Because of this, I am not going to say whether these choices are right or wrong, moral or immoral - if these projections can even exist. Perhaps some of these relationships are necessary for healing trauma - for those who fear being alone, or for those who are desperate to feel loved, wanted, validated, worthy or enough. For young girls in our society, there is so much pressure to be seen as ''sexual''. Well before the advent of the internet, we were bombarded with overtly sexualised images in magazines and music videos. Historically, women have been shamed for appearing sexual - now we are shamed for not being sexually active at a young age.

From conversations with woman in my age range, I have discovered that many women felt immense pressure from their peers to have their first sexual experience during their teenage years. For many, this was not an empowered decision but was one that led to unpleasant or even traumatic experiences. Unfortunately, trauma cannot be healed through experiences that add more trauma, and without the right support and tools, sexual trauma can be incredibly difficult to heal - sometimes this is a journey that takes a lifetime. It affects me deeply to hear these stories from people I care about. The body doesn't forget easily, and these violations of the body can affect intimacy and sexuality for years to come. This is not only about a loss of innocence, but of the lack of understanding that the body and the act of merging with another are beautiful and sacred.

Sadly, the self-love that requires the nurturing and cherishing of our bodies has rarely been taught. When we give our bodies over to others with little thought, it is inevitable that we will become less connected with them, almost disassociated from parts of our bodies and our sexuality. Women's bodies have been owned by others for centuries, so we have come to see our sexuality as something that can be bought and sold and bartered with, as capital to be used to request and receive, rather than something that belongs solely to us and which deserves our protection. When we allow bonding and exchange of energy with someone who does not take our best interests as their own, there can be profoundly negative impacts on our lifeforce and our wellbeing - we can carry the energy of others with us for significant periods of time. When we have sexual contact with others where there is not mutual respect, love and reverence - where there is not safety - we are most likely exacerbating trauma. Maybe there are women, or people, who receive healing in this way, but I have yet to meet them.

In my circles, up until recently, there hasn't been a lot of conversation on this subject, and for those, like me, who have taken a different path - or found themselves on one, there has also been much shame, confusion and self-doubt. It is not easy to be different in the face of judgement from our peers and from the outside world. Also, it is common to be pathologised by those who have made choices that are different from our own - somehow, there is safety with those who validate our choices, as in their company, we are not required to question our choices. I am beginning to meet women who are brave enough to tell their truths, and I am becoming increasingly braver to share mine. So much healing can happen when we are open and vulnerable with one another, as we can realise that we are not alone in our experiences and that there are many ways to live life.

To be able to support other women, perhaps younger women, who are having similar experiences, is an honour and a privilege. To be able to reassure them that perhaps they are not flawed or damaged, that they are not unworthy, unattractive or ''unsexual'', is necessary. We all came here with different life paths and purposes, and it is important that we allow them to unfold rather than constantly doubting and questioning them. There is nothing that we need to prove to any living person. There is not one circumstance in which having sex will serve as proof of a person's value as a human being. Sexuality is one part of who we are as humans, and what we have to share with others. And, it does not have to be expressed to exist. It is time for us to view ourselves, regardless of our sexual history or of any of the choices or experiences of our lives, as innocent and perfect. We are always doing our best and we can't really make mistakes. We learn, as we grow, however, that some choices allow us to expand and flourish and others will cause us pain. We don't have to choose suffering. If we cherish ourselves as sacred beings, we will choose health, balance and joy.

It is important, also, to remember that we cannot impose on others' free will to create or force situations that cannot or do not choose to exist. We cannot imagine someone to be a safe or loving sexual partner and make it so. It is so important that we honour ourselves and that we be discerning. As much as anyone on this earth, I understand what it is to desire things and to want to experience things - to feel the perceived unfairness of life and what it has offered me - to not want to be pitied or judged by others. Statistically, I am incredibly fortunate not to have experienced sexual trauma in this lifetime. I must be sure never to forget that. Sometimes life requires us to have patience and to accept our circumstances in the present moment. The only path to true healing and wholeness is to fully accept and love ourselves as we are, and to meet our own needs for validation and love as much as we can. Only from this place of wholeness, can we experience the merging with another at the physical and spiritual levels that we hope for.

Humans make rules for one another, but these rules don't really exist. Our life experiences are provided for us as we need them. Some are here to learn to manage riches or fame, some are here to learn to care for children, some are here to learn to receive, and others are here to learn how to love. Perhaps your soul has already learned these lessons and is here for a new or groundbreaking experience. There are no boxes that need to be ticked in human timing. There is only Divine timing. The wisdom of the universe is supporting us, always. As humanity heals itself, as the planet ascends, our capacity for higher level experiences of sex and love will increase beyond measure. Perhaps, as higher-dimensional souls who have chosen to inhabit human bodies during this crucial time in Earth's evolution, this is what we really long for. Keep believing in a healed and whole humanity - this is our current timeline, and our destiny.

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