Why You Are Not Broken
Don't ever let anyone tell you that you're broken.
I've been on a spiritual learning journey all of my life, but over the last few months I've had a renewed interest in delving deeper. In doing so, I decided to dip my toes further in, and over the weekend I had my first psychic reading and then spontaneously, on Sunday, an aura and chakra scan. In themselves, these were perfectly safe, positive experiences. But, on the other hand, any type of personal development work requires that we take a good look at aspects of ourselves, those visible and those not so visible, and that we have the mental and emotional capacity to assimilate the new information that we uncover. I didn't expect that processing this information would require some tears and a sleepless night, but that's how it works. As Dr Phil says, "you can't change what you don't acknowledge'', and I totally agree. We are not required to work on ourselves, but if we choose to do so we reap the benefits of increased levels of thinking, feeling and perceiving - we become new people who have access to higher levels of consciousness and therefore greater possibilities in life.
The psychic reading was nurturing and supportive - I have no complaints there. I trusted myself to read the energy of the person before I chose him. I wasn't looking for particular answers, I was just curious about having the experience. The second experience was more confronting than I expected, as I was required to divulge some personal information that I hadn't been prepared for. Generally, this doesn't bother me, though, as I believe that I'm a human in development, an example of perfect imperfection as we all are, and I know that I am doing my best in every moment of my life with the knowledge and understanding that I have. The issues that were raised were not new or surprising to me, and it was due more to the presentation that the experiences differed from one another and that the second one required additional processing.
In the realm of spirituality and personal development, in my opinion, a great teacher or healer is one who reminds us of our own power. Similar to, "give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, teach him how to fish and you feed him for a lifetime''. Rather than implying that people's lives need fixing, we can offer our skills or our personal or professional love to help them meet their goals or achieve their dreams. I believe that we all achieve different levels of growth in particular areas of our lives because these areas were our souls' priorities when we entered this physical body. Therefore, we should not compare our lives to anyone else's. Because I am an independent learner and a very self-aware person, I can be resistant to assessments from knowledgeable others. I don't believe that anyone will ever expect more from me than I do from myself and I believe that I know myself more than anyone ever has or will. At the same time, this occasionally prompts me to extend my comfort zone by allowing some outside influence - reminding myself that my eyes may be clouded by my personal perspective and that I may benefit from considering additional ones. So, in this spirit, I allowed the outside perspective, but then had to go through a process of rebuilding myself in compensation for it.
If I am not seeing the concrete evidence of something in my life, it is not because I am unaware of it, it is simply because I don't yet have the tools or sense of direction to set it in motion. I think a lot of us would feel this way. We know what we would like to have or do in our life, but we don't yet know how to make these things happen. This is completely normal. As Abraham Hicks would say, "Do you want to eat all the food you will eat in a lifetime all in one day?'' Naturally not. We want to savour things, enjoy the journey, find new desires, and meet new challenges throughout our lives. Life is not a race and the desire for more is what keeps us inspired to continue through it. Also, if you attracted your dream job at an early age, would you have the skills and stamina to navigate it? Sometimes we need more life experience or spiritual growth to reach a point at which the things we truly desire are able to come to us. The experience of a new relationship will be different when we are in our twenties to if we are in our forties. The universe already has our order form and is continually updating it as we grow and change. Every thought and word and intention creates that order form, and divine timing will bring our order to us if we are in the mindset and heart space to receive it.
We know, inside ourselves, that we are in a continual process of self-growth. We are not sick and we are not broken. If we are tuned-in, life will happen for us, not to us. The knowledgeable others that I connected with on the weekend reinforced the importance of setting intentions and holding to boundaries. We are the architects of our lives, the creators of our reality. Yes, we should seek outside help if we need it, but we have the power within ourselves to build positive energy fields around us. I worked with my body and a higher power to heal what some might have considered to be an 'incurable' illness, and nobody can tell me that I am powerless or that negative energy has power over me. This was the biggest lesson of the weekend. We need to be strong in our own power. We have the intelligence of many lifetimes. Yes, we have fear, but fear is a divine gift, a protection mechanism. But, we also have strength and we have courage. We have the capacity to love deeply and to 'dare greatly' (Brené Brown). We just have to learn to trust and apply these abilities.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness That most frightens us.
We ask ourselves Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small Does not serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking So that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, As children do. We were born to make manifest The glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us; It's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, Our presence automatically liberates others.
- Marianne Williamson, Our Deepest Fear, from A Return to Love.
Abraham Hicks. (2021). Law of attraction website. Abraham-Hicks Publications - Law of Attraction Official Site
Brené Brown. (2021). Official website. Brené Brown (brenebrown.com)
Marianne Williamson. (2021). Official website. Marianne Williamson – #1 New York Times Best-Selling Author