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  • Penny Muller

Why should I release attachment?

Remaining attached to people, places and things might be holding us back.

A few years ago, I set in motion a minimalist journey - you might call it a journey of intentionality - that changed my life. Slowly, piece-by-piece, I sorted through my belongings and let go of the ones that were no longer serving me. I learned that we hold on to belongings out of attachment to the past or fear of the future. Our reasons for keeping our 'things' are so that we can remember and keep in touch with our past experiences, and because we think we might need our belongings one day. So, we keep hold of our possessions out of a sense of lack. This makes sense, as most of us have been raised to prepare for eventualities such as the possibility of not having what we need in the future. Although this seems sensible, it goes against our highest vibration, which involves a belief in abundance and a trust that the universe is supporting our efforts to create lives of fulfillment and contribution. A belief in lack will only create more lack, and it is when we release attachment to our scarcity mindset that we start to attract enriching experiences into our lives.

As I have said in previous articles, there is nothing wrong with wanting beautiful things. An abundant life can contain an unlimited supply of these, but it is when we start to release the 'just in case' items, that we make space for wonderful new things to come into our lives. Removing unwanted belongings also facilitates us to release emotions that are affecting us. We might have objects in our homes that are reminding us of things that we feel we should be doing, for example books that we have been meaning to read or craft projects that we feel we should finish, or an exercise machine or musical instrument that is sitting unused. Because these objects are in our space, draining our energy with their presence, we are distracted from our ability to tune in to the experiences that our souls are calling us towards. Releasing 'shoulds' enables us to start to really listen to our true desires. Similarly, our belongings can be causing us pain through reminding us of unwanted memories, past experiences, people, or even our past selves that were less enlightened. Although it is beneficial to reflect on where we've been and how much we have progressed, being surrounded by objects or even wearing clothes that evoke our past selves can keep us stuck in old identities and prevent us from reaching our full potential.

Many people find it comforting to be cushioned by familiar places and faces, choosing to live in the same places for years or persist with the same social networks regardless of whether they are healthy or sustaining. Some prefer not to travel or vary their favourite holiday locations, staying with tried and true people and experiences. These may feel like the easier options, but if we choose these paths we are missing out on the energetic clearing that can take place. There is so much freedom and ease in discovering that you are no longer attached to the circumstances, fears and mindsets of the past. Releasing attachment refers to a mindset or habit of thought, so I'm not proposing that we all must change our location or throw out all of our things, however physical and concrete changes can help us to shift habits of thought and make space for the unknown. The space of the unknown contains the golden nuggets - there is no doubt about this.

Having lived in multiple cities, states and countries, I have experienced this firsthand. My life has taken me on a magic carpet ride through a variety of experiences; exhilarating, terrifying and painful, but I can tell you that I found treasures in all of them. Letting go was sometimes difficult. Each time that life called me to take another path, I was required to say goodbye to people and places that I felt strongly connected to. It's not easy. I'm feeling a greater sense of trust and a natural joy in this releasing process now, however, which is replacing that need to grieve for those things that can appear to be being taken away with each new phase of life. I'm learning that we can love people, places and things without feeling attached to them. This is about an abundance mindset - trusting that people, experiences and things come in and out of our lives in divine sequence, for our highest good, and according to our souls' true desires and intentions.

As with all the principles that I talk about, this is a spiritual practice that we can embrace when we are ready to live in accordance with what our higher self intends for this lifetime. We are here to have experiences that aid our souls' growth and if we can go towards these experiences with open arms, life won't have to step in to catalyze painful changes for us. Releasing attachment enables us to see things differently, allowing us to explore new aspects of our identity and expand our capabilities. We start to move into a flow state with life and become more resonant with what we want to experience and accomplish. We become less affected by other people's movements and choices and their opinions of us. We become more comfortable with uncertainty and with being alone. We have less need to own things. We start to feel secure even without physical security.

This aspect of my spiritual awakening really unfolded for me during my first solo overseas trip, when I was 22. I was alone in Milan, in a very spartan nunnery hostel with rock-hard beds and nuns who didn't speak English. The future was completely undecided, but I felt incredibly safe, extraordinarily connected to a force that was greater than myself. I knew in that moment that no matter where I was in the world, I would be divinely protected and guided. Although there have been many challenging times since then, when my fear of the future and the emptiness overtook me, fundamentally I always felt safe. Now, the emptiness feels more like liberation, the fear has become an occasional niggling doubt, and I feel more whole than I ever thought possible.

There is nothing more certain in life than change, and change is a great gift that will open our paths and show us the way forward. There are great changes happening in our world and these will be for the greatest good. It is time that we become open to this change and choose to be agents for it. Many people are resistant to looking at what is and what has been, but there is nothing to fear. Change will feel like it is happening to us if we turn away from it and refuse to move with it, but it will happen for us if we make the choice to be part of it. There has been a lot of darkness in our world and there are many courageous souls who have been willing to be present to this darkness and transform it into light. Empaths, truthers, writers, healers and many others from around the world are coming together as warriors for good. If we can learn to trust ourselves and our higher perspectives rather than staying lost in the confusion that is around us, we can join these wayshowers and hold space for new knowledge, beauty and love that is waiting for us in the unknown.

Remember, in the unknown is the gold, the jewels, and the treasure, and they're there for us. It's so important though, that we release attachment to everything that we think we know. Liberation comes when we can proceed through life being open to every new possibility. We need to have our eyes wide open rather than clinging to the familiar, both in relation to our personal lives and in relation to the wider world. When we are attached to what is comfortable, we're not seeing truth. We are existing in our own sheltered dream world rather than living according to a more expansive perspective, which is much more real and vastly more compelling. With this broader perspective, there is additional freedom, clarity and security. There is significantly less fear. I would like to invite you to reflect, today, on what you would like to release. You might make a list. Look deep within for the things that you know are not serving you. Begin with your belongings; next, allow relationships with people and places to shift and evolve; then start letting go of thoughts, emotions and perspectives that are no longer relevant or satisfying. As Marie Kondo would say, keep those that ''spark joy''. As for the rest, thank them for their service and their lessons, and with love, release them. Send them off in the wind, with a kiss or a tear, and relish the delicious liberties that come to take their place.


There is freedom waiting for you,

On the breezes of the sky,

And you ask "What if I fall?"

Oh but my darling,

What if you fly?


Erin Hanson



Freedom Quotes (8102 quotes) (goodreads.com)


Home Page – KonMari | The Official Website of Marie Kondo



Some of my previous blog articles relating to this subject are:


10 Reasons to be Intentional about our Belongings (pennymuller.com)

Creating Space (pennymuller.com)

Letting go (pennymuller.com)

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